Marriage right after college is not as bad as society makes it sound

By Elizabeth Sekkes

Comment Staff

Planning a wedding in the midst of writing papers and studying for finals can be extremely difficult, but also very rewarding. Photo by Elizabeth Sekkes.
Planning a wedding in the midst of writing papers and studying for finals can be extremely difficult, but also very rewarding. Photo by Elizabeth Sekkes.

Throughout my senior year at Bridgewater State University, I have walked a very different path than most of my student peers.

While most seniors focus their attention on the last few weeks of the semester on such events as Springfest, Senior Ball and their graduation parties, I spend my spare time listening my way through wedding song playlists on YouTube, choosing baskets and silk flower petals for my flower girls to carry, and making special concessions to my reception menu for my friends with allergies. Getting married a mere month after graduation can keep a girl hopping.

In the past ten months since I have been engaged, I have received mixed responses to my choice to marry right after college.

While many people have been tremendously supportive, I have frequently found myself listening to such remarks as “I’m nowhere near ready to get married,” or, “I wouldn’t even know at that point in life whether the person I was with would be right.”

I then try to explain to my opposers to the best of my ability that I harbor no such inhibitions.

When you’re in a bad relationship, nearly everything about your union with the person feels wrong and unsettling. Try as you may to suppress the growing conviction that you are not where you should be, you know deep down in your soul that it is time to step away.

In contrast, when you are in a relationship like the one that I share with my fiancé, everything about the two of you and where you are progressing feels perfect and right. Doubts, questions, and fear simply have no time or place in your mind.

Moreover, spontaneous and fun-filled plans, such as to travel, become much more appealing when I add my husband to the equation. What’s more fun than exploring new places with the man you love?

While many express concern that I am too young to make such a crucial choice in life, I explain to them that this has been a gradual and timely decision.

Peter, my fiance, and I first met during my freshman year in college. Within a minimal matter of months, we knew we were destined to be together. From there, everything we aimed for and worked toward became about us being together once I graduated.

For three years we have planned and dreamed, while working hard to make our dearest aspiration a reality. When Peter officially popped the question last August, I knew that the semester to come would be a very full, but happy one.

To my fellow student peers, skeptics and bride wannabes, my best advice to you is the same advice I give to all my girlfriends. Hold out and remain as patient as possible while you wait for that special person to make an appearance in your life.

When you meet the person you are meant to live your life with, it is as though the convoluted pieces of the puzzle in your life that you’ve been trying to solve finally fit together, to quietly create a perfect and harmonious picture.

Don’t settle for anything that feels less than what you know you’ve always wanted. And don’t point fingers at those who may have already reached a point that you’re still working toward.

We all reach our goals in the time that is perfect for us individually.

Elizabeth Sekkes is the News Editor at The Comment. Email her at esekkes@student.bridgew.edu.

 

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